Advice for Students Struggling with Online Classes
I’ve recently has received emails from students who are frustrated by their inability to get their head in the game, and others who are fear failure at this stressful time in the semester. Here, I provide some tips about how to survive a COVID-related academic funk.
1. Immediately and unequivocally forgive yourself for being where you’re are right now.
Powerful factors beyond your control contributed to the reality you now face. Feel free to release any shame you might be feeling, related to poor performance. Offer deep compassion for yourself. You never wanted to be in this uncomfortable inward state. So, recognize the reality of the uncomfortable feelings you now feel. Be merciful and kind to yourself in this situation, just as you cultivate compassion for others who are also struggling to keep their commitments. Moreover, release all care about how we professors view you. We are working for you, and there is nothing to be ashamed of, just choices to make in each immediate moment. It’s not that you are or your teachers helpless, but that most people would respond to your circumstances in similar ways. There is a way out of this rut, but the way out starts with releasing negative self-judgment about being in the rut in the first place.
2. Have gratitude for your failures.
Failure can be a powerful teacher, so use it for your academic growth. As the ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said:
In the end,
there’s really no difference
between success and failure,
since we receive lessons from both. (TTC 20)
This part is important. While, in the first step, you realized that there were things outside your control that brought you to where you find yourself right now, there are also things you now know that will help you plan for effective action in the future. Were early classes a problem? Switch to a couple night classes next term. Do you struggle with self-paced learning? Then register only for synchronous classes. Whatever you can glean from this or any difficult experience, don’t ignore lessons presented by challenges. Be open to confronting tough truths, then claim your own empowerment to counteract forces that have stood in your way or weighed you down.
3. Focus on the One.
Lao Tzu famously said: “the journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.” If you look at everything you’ve got to do, you’ll just freeze up. But the Tao is singular in that it involves one thing at a time. When its time to laugh, laugh. When you in the mood to cook, cook. When you play, release worries about work. As an ancient Hebrew sage noted: there is a time for everything under the sun. But remember to take that everything one thing at a time.
So, when you get up in the morning, take a deep breath and ask yourself what the one most important thing is you need to accomplish that day. Focus on that and when you’re finished—say, at 10 AM—ask yourself what the next single most important thing is. That becomes the new focus, and so on. If you get three great things of this sort done in a day, I bet you’ll feel great about yourself and discover motivation to knock out something else with less anxiety. After a few days of this, you’ll find that you’ve climbed a mountain of tasks.
4. Reset your ultimate goal.
When you envision a future self that is happy and free, what relationships and vocations in your life might bring you joy? Let this positive vision help you align your daily priorities. If you notice that most of energy you expend doesn’t serve that vision, feel free to cut it out and bid it farewell. If, however, your daily tasks are important to that vision, then learn to love those mundane tasks for the sake of your future joy. Even though you are working toward a future objective, be sure to use this as a motivation for focusing on the particular thing you might be doing at each moment. The point of the future vision is not to serve as a reward for your otherwise miserable work, but rather helps you to make sure you don’t do too much that is a waste of your time. By remembering that the hard work one does is part of a larger life strategy, we can more easily make peace with each tasks at hand.
5. Pause at least once each day for a moment of silent meditation and gratitude.
Even if you think it’s a goofy hippie idea, I recommend that you try daily, silent meditation (influenced by the Zen practice of zazen) for at least a month. Sit on a pillow for 30 minutes to an hour at a time when you won’t be bothered. Elongate your spine, but enjoy a slight curve so you remain comfortable. Gently tuck your chin in so your head can stretch gently to the sky. Notice your breath. Indeed, focus on the breath is the only thing you really need to remember in all this. The point is to just stay in this position. There’s nothing to accomplish. There’s nothing specific to learn. When thoughts come through your mind, notice them, and then send them on their way. Half-close your eyes and stare down at the ground at a 45 degree angle. Fold your hands comfortably in your lap or turn your palms upward on your knees. Then stretch and slowly return to your day. This will help your body know instantly what it is to be still and focused on something right in front of you.
6. Exercise and eat well.
This is essential and yet neglected. Even if you’re quarantined in a condo, find an exercise routine and keep at it. Then, spend a lot of your extra time focusing on creating super tasty cuisine. Even if you think you don’t have enough time to exercise and prepare good food, in the long run these healthy practices will help you be effective during the times you carve out for work. If you must, listen to lectures while you walk or cook, but only do that if you’ve got yourself into a jam in which every hour is needed to complete schoolwork.
7. Find a study buddy.
Sure, you can get a tutor. But I’m talking about someone else in the class with whom you can discuss the material, perhaps over zoom. Granted, this may be part of your fatigue, but having that one on one conversation and engagement may be better than more passive watching of a class. Even better, if you live with family members or room mates, see if you can schedule regular times to talk out loud and in person about what you’re learning. By trying to verbalize what you are reading and hearing, you may be able to keep your mind clear and alert with respect to your coursework.
Whoever you are, dear scholar, remember that this is important preparation for life, but it is not all of life. Play to your strengths, don’t lose heart. We’ll get through this. Also, please remember to mute yourself before jumping into class.